Breakdown
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Breakdown is one series of lore entries that comes in the Lightfall's Collector Edition, alongside Beloved and Bitter. It contains a series of messages and logs between Ikora Rey and Osiris, evaluating his current status and what he had experienced in as time between the events of Beyond Light and The Witch Queen.
Message between Ikora and Ophiuchus
It's not that I disagree with the judgment call," Ophiuchus said and revolved gently on the spot. "But you can't go easy on him."
"It's an evaluation, not an interrogation." Ikora did not give in to the impulse to fold her arms. This time.
"You know what I mean."
Ikora sighed very softly. He was right, all things considered. "I don't intend to. And I'm... well aware that there's an equal helping of suspicion on me for not seeing through Savathûn's deception."
"We didn't see through it." Ophiuchus's correction was as firm as his earlier challenge. "It was a complex series of failures that can't be laid on any one person."
Ikora shook her head. "She never could have impersonated him so successfully if Sagira was alive."
Loss echoed loudly.
"In that respect, I suppose Xivu Arath did her sister a favor," Ikora finished.
"Yes. It's sad..."
Something unsaid lingered there. "But?" Ikora prompted.
"But," Ophiuchus continued, "You can't tell me you didn't think it too. Just for a moment. About bringing her shell back to the Relic on Mars..."
"There was a moment–just a breath–where I... hoped," Ikora agreed. "I shouldn't have."
"Hope doesn't often obey wisdom. "Ophiuchus fixed her with his single gimlet eye.
Though he wasn't wrong, Ikora wasn't wholly interested in being generous to her failings. "All of the hope in the world doesn't change facts. A relic of Darkness is unlikely to be capable of restoring a Ghost crafted largely of Light. No matter how.. nice it would be, if Sagira could simply pick right back up with Osiris, wash away these last months, just like that."
"Our problems never solve so easily," Ophiuchus said, not unkindly. He drifted close enough to bump against Ikora's shoulder, just above the shimmer of her Bond.
Ikora steadied herself. "Untrue. Eva Levante provides us perfectly fixable problems."
A little whirr of amusement. "Shall we see if the Witness is afraid of the Dawning?"
The thought compelled an exchange of almost-stifled laughter. "Doubtful," Ikora mused. But the mental image was a good busy. "In any case, I'll speak with Osiris alone, although the records will be available to you. I'm sure you may spot something I've missed."
Ophiuchus hummed a little more. "You know he may never be ready for the field again."
"He certainly wouldn't like to be told that." Ikora held up her hand before her Ghost could answer. "But one step at a time: field readiness assessment before we make any determination, the same way we would for any Hidden agent who's come out of a dark place." Her mouth twisted, "Wouldn't it be nice if checking in on Osiris could be as simple as asking, Are you all right?"
"Hah," Ophiuchus said, pessimism in a single syllable. "Never happen."
SUBJ: First debriefing with Osiris
Contextual notes:
Osiris looks smaller than my memory of him. It's as if the version of him that Savathûn played was based on our expectations, the larger-than-life man and the long shadow he's always cast. Or perhaps she played an Osiris newly separated from Sagira, one who did not yet feel the weight of the loss, had not been given the chance to.
Now Osiris seems plainly Human, in a way he never has, even at his most despairing, and I barely think I recognize him. But today, a familiar glimmer of his former self roused over the strong scent of the tea I made, and gave me a sort of patient-impatient look over the rim of the cup, as if to say he knows what I'm about and is going to do me the courtesy of not mentioning it.
That's just as well. Osiris never has been one to sit down and openly talk about his feelings, and I doubt very much if his time in Savathûn's possession will have changed that. Still, as I said to Ophiuchus, a shared pretext can go a very long way between those long familiar with each other.
Transcript of conversation:
O: If you're going to try to spare my feelings, too, Ikora-
I: It had crossed my mind to be polite to someone who's been held captive by our enemy for a year, yes.
O:... That was unworthy of me.
I: You're going to have to work harder than that to offend me, Osiris.
O: [barely audible laugh] We shall see how that goes. I'm assuming you want to talk about... the intelligence I had gained.
I: Yes. You haven't said much about what it is, only that you remember a little—I want to start from the last place we saw you before you were kidnapped and establish the full chain of events. There was some fuzziness about when you were last... you.
O: Hmph.
O: [pause; deep breath] It was on Luna. The same place I lost...
I: Sagira.
O:...But that was a place of Xivu Arath's power. It is... muddled, after I left that place. I do not think I made it so very far away from the Hellmouth, in truth. I was not thinking straight, if I was thinking at all.
I: Do you remember meeting... perhaps not Savathûn. But no agent of hers? Nothing beyond the Hellmouth that might in retrospect be attributed to her?
O: Nothing. At least, I don't... [frustrated sigh] No. Nothing that I can recall.
I: If nothing else, knowing that you don't know is something.
O: Laughably little. [A frown at the empty cup. He took the teapot, refilled both cups. Slowly.]
O: I wanted to blame you. Surely, I thought, you should have seen. Surely...
I: I certainly blamed myself. If anyone could have identified that you were not yourself-
O: My best student should have?
I:... Yes.
O: Hmph. So we have all paid for that hubris.
I: And Savathûn's gains... well, you are aware of the costs created by insufficient discernment of truth.
O: Yes. So I am.
[Long period of silence. Not a technical transcription fault.]
O: Perhaps such blame is misplaced. After all, if she were discovered, what would Savathûn have done in response?
I: She might simply have moved up her plans to offer a bargain. Perhaps she would have known less of Vanguard operations. Perhaps you would never have been returned to us at all. Perhaps our Guardians might have stormed her throne world regardless. After all, they are very motivated when new weapons and old friends are involved. The variables involved would give even a prediction engine difficulty.
O: Hmmm. Then perhaps you should not have made the bargain in the first place, Ikora.
I: Osiris...
O: Don't mistake my words for ill-guided martyrdom. That I am alive, and here now, is a gift I don't intend to waste.
I: Then don't.
O: But I am not wholly oblivious to the state of things in the City. People question me. Whatever cachet I maintained after my exile, whatever Savathún gained in my stead, it is all useless now.
O: [sips tea] People should question their leaders. Including the Vanguard. But where leadership is not only challenged but also untrusted, then there is much room for expanding chaos. Corruption, even.
I: I know. Believe me, I know.
[Silence, ibid.]
O: Do you trust me, Ikora?
I: I'd like to say that I do. Perhaps it's better to say that I trust you, Osiris. But I still wonder if I trust my own perceptions.
O: Good.
"Well, he's Osiris," Ophiuchus concluded. The pieces of his shell flexed one final time before settling into place, compact as ever. "I don't know what else we expected."
Ikora compressed a smile and wrapped her hand around the small recorder. "You joke, but..."
Ophiuchus played a thin touch of Light across her curled fingers. "You think he sounds too much like himself."
"Perhaps I'm being overly cautious." She opened her grasp, revealing an empty palm first, then producing the recorder again to pass over to Ophiuchus. A pointless trick, but worth a moment of a smile. "Perhaps I think too much of what will be perceived in a failure to be overly cautious."
Ophiuchus whirred quietly, thoughtfully. "An ounce of prevention, and all that."
Ikora breathed out a quiet sigh, as to expel her worries with it. "Optics aside, I do worry about Osiris. Despite his many strengths, he is only Human. Even a stone may be worn down in time; and people are not so resilient as stones.
Ophiuchus, for once, did not argue with her logic.
SUBJ: Second debriefing with Osiris
Contextual notes:
Osiris and I spoke again perhaps a week after the first conversation, in the same secure location—my office. It isn't the best solution—he is still not at his full strength—but the security concerns triumphed, and he agreed with that.
The tea was different: I tried a blend with chamomile, reasoning that there wasn't a single person in the Tower who couldn't use an extra bit of calm.
He took a mouthful of the chamomile tea and grimaced at me, though I could not say if it was in judgment of the flavor or the intended effects. Regardless, I was not offended.
I had something extra for Osiris this time: Sagira's shell. It had been held in secure Hidden storage due to the value of the attached memories, but in the course of LIN-357's assessment of the Altars of Reflection, I was assured his thoroughness had extracted anything we could possibly gain from it. So, while the other artifacts have remained locked away in a secure vault, this one I brought to return to Osiris.
I offered him Sagira's shell without any other indication of what I meant to accomplish. Osiris cradled her between his hands with utmost tenderness, and his face...
I wonder how I could have mistaken Savathûn for him. I wonder how I could have suspected the man before me. It seems clear now in retrospect, of course, with the one to hold up beside the other. Savathûn had never spoken very much of Sagira's loss, and I had taken it for grief compressed—coping tied firmly down, not to be addressed. I had thought it was not my business to tell him how to grieve, not when Xivu Arath and then the Cabal Empire were knocking at our door with wrath and battering rams.
Oh, but this–-this is a grief too big for even a man of his caliber to chain down.
Other notes of relevance: Transcript abbreviated slightly. We spoke delicately of tactical matters for a few minutes, but did not approach the emotional issues after a certain point. Osiris's mind is as sharp as ever, and when we are not speaking close to the heart, he is analytical, if leaning to the pessimistic.
Transcript of conversation:
O: I assume you must have come to some conclusion, then.
I: What makes you say that?
O: You would not have returned her to me if you doubted your course.
I:...No, I wouldn't have.
O: Mm. I might have hoped your caution would outlast your emotion.
I: The judgment call is still mine. In truth, it is highly improbable that Savathûn would repeat the same trick twice; and besides that, she is dead.
O: Is she, truly? I was told... she had a Ghost.
I: Immaru. Yes. He yet survives. But we have sequestered Savathûn's body securely, and my Hidden scraped the area for errant genetic material.
O: That's no guarantee.
I: This tactic worked in the Dark Age. It seems to hold—we have seen no evidence of a resurgence.
O: Hmph. I wouldn't be so sure. She's managed greater deceptions.
I: The Ghosts also don't think it possible, with the precautions we've taken. A disintegration might be catastrophic to that cause, but keeping the body intact and inaccessible seems to work.
O: The Dark Age was a long time ago, now. Who knows what innovations the Hive have brought to the Ghosts.
I: They are still Ghosts.
O: Are they?
I: While we may distinguish between Lightbearers and Guardians, there is no equivalent for Ghosts. And a difference in nomenclature would hardly make much change to their capabilities.
O: We must be prepared for a ploy we cannot see. Ikora. Where does this confidence come from, when the Queen of Lies is the opponent?
I: We do have an... informant when it comes to the Hive. A conscientious objector. While for obvious reasons I can't say more, we are not so directly inhibited when it comes to matters of the Lucent Hive's capabilities.
O: Tell me when you are able.
Ophiuchus was silent for some time after he had finished scanning the second report. Ikora didn't press, choosing instead to stare down at Osiris's empty cup and the cushion where he'd sat.
"It strikes me as ironic," Ophiuchus said finally, "that the problem caused by Sagira's absence is one she would have been perfectly suited to solve."
Ikora's mouth curved, a complication of emotion in the bare shape of amusement. "Paradoxical irony, yes."
She fiddled with the audio recorder, marking it as sealed, no further changes. "I still wonder at his reaction to Immaru and our method of preventing Savathûn's resurrection."
Ophiuchus drifted over the low table and around the empty tea-things; his shell plates moved in a ripple of discrete sections, suggesting a shrug. "It sounded like fear to me. Quiet fear, perhaps, but fear all the same."
"...I have rarely known Osiris to be truly afraid of anything," Ikora admitted. Once more, she felt as though she stood on unstable ground.
"And now, after over a year in Savathûn's possession?" Ophiuchus pressed.
Ikora found she did not have the stomach to finish the thought, and so she let it pass by, into that twilight where things fade that were known but never spoken.
SUBJ: Third debriefing with Osiris
Contextual notes:
A week since the last debriefing. Osiris seemed in better spirits today. Perhaps there had been more time to pack troubling things away; perhaps, having Sagira's shell in hand, he was secure in knowing the worst blow had already fallen.
There was one point in the conversation where he fell into self-reflection, murmuring he did not look at me, and his voice was not steady. Somewhere deep in memory, perhaps—whether it was his own or Savathûn's. For the most part he was coherent, himself: but here, I wondered again if it was safe to let him back into the field.
Or if I could, in truth, forbid him.
Transcript of conversation:
O: I see you've changed teas again.
I: And I saw the face you made at the chamomile.
O: You might have chosen a better blend, last time.
I: I can brew that instead, if you'd rather.
O: You had more questions, didn't you? Ask, already.
I:... Yes. I want to know about what you remember from the last year. Anything could be important, and you implied...
O: I remember what I implied. I remember... She... kept some sort of connection to me, to rely on my experiences and memories, you see. Most of the time, I was delirious and lost in Darkness. Very occasionally, I caught... glimpses.
I: Glimpses?
O: Yes. Of her. Of her thoughts, or feelings. Knowledge that surely would compromise a god of secrets. So it cannot have been intended. Something must have gone awry in her plans and would account for the scattered nature of that which I recall.
I: There are any number of things it could be attributed to. The influence of Darkness, the Nezarec relics. The intrusion of Xivu Arath's forces during the ritual might have disrupted Savathûn's influence. Or perhaps her death and resurrection might have had some effect on you.
O: Hmph. Debating the reasons does not interest me. The data does. We have thought Neptune to be a dead end. A hope that was never realized. But she knew something about it, or perhaps something on it, which brought her power. Some deception or hidden truth; some bluff that she had held uncalled against the Witness and its Disciples.
O: [sips tea] Though my senses were darkened, that much was clear through the murk of her throne world. There was a secret she kept veiled, even to the last.
O: [sighs] I do not fully understand what I saw, and for a Human to understand a Hive mind... How many legends of katabasis do we have, Ikora?
I: We currently have dozens of stories about descending to the realms of the dead, though research has indicated many more must have existed, lost in the layers of Human history we will never lay eyes on. Mathematically, there were likely hundreds.
I: [pauses] Inanna and Dumuzid and Geshtinanna, Orpheus and Eurydice, Izanagi and Izanami, to name a few. Gods and goddesses, mortal and immortal lovers, always seeking to descend and return with the lost.
O: And neither the lost nor those who searched for them were ever returned the same.
I:...Is that how you think of yourself?
O: [scoffs] Do I sound that dire? All Guardians, all Lightbearers have done as much. But others, well... I wonder, do our former enemies have similar stories...
I: What exactly are you getting at?
O: Frequently, the underworld—or those realms beyond mortal existence—possess wisdom the living do not. What then, is knowledge from a dead Hive god vested in deception.... [long pause]
I: So. Neptune, and secrets.
O:...Inanna...
I: What is it?
O:...A thought. An echo of one. The return from the underworld, and Inanna cast off her veil... It makes sense. I did not understand, when I first felt clutching whispers. Carrying wisdom away from Kur when she strode into the sunlight again.
[Osiris murmuring, self-directed. See initial notes.]
O: [focusing; clears throat] Ikora. This Witness. ...I do not say this lightly, but it made her wary. Not in the way that she might have been of Guardians, who storm blazing into battle with power and conviction and no restraints. I still feel it, her... concern, though I can give you no proof. And concern is exactly the type of thing she would lay contingency plans for…
I: I understand.
"I never would've thought there was anything that could scare a Hive queen. It's worrying."
"Of course it's worrying. He as much as said Savathûn was scared of the Witness."
Ikora and Ophiuchus did not look at each other; the shared feeling resonated in the gap between them, tremulously tangible.
"And if he had that close of a connection, Savathûn could have left one of those contingency plans in him," Ophiuchus said finally. "We both want to trust him, but there's no guarantee that Neptune is anything other than a trap."
Ikora linked her hands behind her back, squaring her shoulders. "If we assume Osiris stole the knowledge unwitnessed, then it is a treasure, a secret that may bring us some useful scraps. If we assume she gave that knowledge to him as bait, then we still know Savathûn had some interest there, if not an outright presence—but why Neptune? Guardians have been there before and found nothing.
Ophiuchus whirred emphatically with a thinking-processing noise. "Did we steal Osiris back? Or was he given, to plant the seed of a trap on Neptune?"
"With all the effort we went to..." Ikora shook her head. "And yet, mounting a guard makes that which is guarded seem even more valuable. That, too, might have been a ploy."
"Then we are right back where we started." Ophiuchus swung back and forth in the air for a few moments.
SUBJ: Fourth debriefing with Osiris
Contextual notes:
This was not my finest moment.
Transcript of conversation:
O: What, no tea this time?
I: Osiris.
O: The look on your face does not reassure.
I: [pauses; clunk of teapot] Are you all right?
O: Of course not. You might ask a more sensible question.
I: Fine. Then let me start by saying you are exceedingly capable at the best of times; and, more to the point, well versed in holding together throughout the impossible. So I must ask: are you and Saint... harmonious?
O: It is fine. [pauses]
O: Perhaps fine is inadequate. We have talked. We continue to talk. His was the first face I saw when I woke, and for that, I am glad.
I: Good. When she was wearing your face, Savathûn was distant with everyone, to an extent. We took it at the time for withdrawal ascribable to grief. Saint mentioned he had tried to reach out with limited success—
O: I remember seeing him through her eyes. I tried to call out... but he was distant. Perhaps it's for the best I cannot recall more.
[Pauses, recovering himself. A brief shadow, physiological signs of stress. Teacup, rattling. Rhythm-memetic? Innocuous?]
I: Osiris... what you're experiencing is normal.
O: [scoffs] You speak with many who return Lightless from Hive captivity, do you?
I: What I mean is that whatever you are pressing down—and I think I know you well enough to know there is more than I have seen—it is normal to feel, and not a personal failing. Nor does it make you less of yourself.
O: Hah. Am I to understand that this... uselessness is something you expect?
I: You are still Osiris.
O: Not to be allowed to fade into obscurity as a dour old man, hm?
I: Is that what you want? I certainly don't think it applies.
O:...I do not think I have ever truly felt my age before. It is... disconcerting. Ikora. Will you send agents to Neptune? To look?
I: Many are still deployed, but... yes. As soon as I can justify the resources.
O:...Hm.
I: It isn't that I don't believe you.
O: I did not say you didn't.
I: If you remember anything else in the meantime...
O: Of course. Anything to help you justify the resources.
"Is 'yikes, that didn't go well,' better or worse than 'I told you so?'"
Ikora gave Ophiuchus a firm, meaningful stare, but it was lost on him as he was otherwise occupied with the records.
"Neither is required," she said. "In any case, none of our telemetry has ever returned anything helpful regarding Neptune. Whatever Golden Age plans were made for the planet, they never reached fruition."
"Someplace so innocuous would be the perfect place to hide something, wouldn't it?" Ophiuchus had a sort of innocent pointedness about his tone. "It's almost too innocuous. So little interesting telemetry..."
"You didn't seem convinced Neptune might be anything but a trap last time we spoke about it. What changed?"
"Your opinion," Ophiuchus said promptly. "Among the rest of the data. There's one other strangeness I wanted to draw your attention to...
"Only one?"
Amusement colored his tone. "I went back over the transcripts; specifically, Osiris's reference to Inanna. I did a little research, and per the stories I have, Inanna never left the underworld of her own recognizance. Her life was taken back by the other gods... Well, he wasn't entirely wrong, either; it was just strange."
Ikora tilted her head slightly, eyes unfocused with the distance of thought. "I don't know how much the details matter," she said slowly, "but it interests me that he fixed on Inanna, after I mentioned her. I doubt ancient Earth myths are the practical highest priority right now, for him, or for any of us…"
"All true," Ophiuchus said, and fell silent.
The Ghost's doubt remained tangible, braided alongside Ikora's.
SUBJ: Conclusions with Osiris
I've been over the logs of our conversations several times, and still can't come to a solid conclusion on the correct course of action. Osiris acts like any person might when struck with incalculable grief and trauma— sometimes himself and other times distant, sometimes reserved and then inclined to argue just as quickly. He is self-aware, at least, but in my experience, the self-aware often grow frustrated quickly if they are unable to resolve that which they are struggling against.
He no longer has Light, nor a companion to pull him from danger and temper his most reckless instincts. This alone would make him a danger to himself, if not others, in the field. It is still unclear if he is fully free from Savathun's influence, and the question of Neptune remains outstanding. I have not yet received word from the Hidden sent to sweep the most apparent locations.
Clearing Osiris for fieldwork carries its own risks. Besides those enumerated above, public perception that he is fully trusted and approved of may cause backlash, foolishness. or both. Will he chafe so much at being restricted that he will simply go on his own? If that's the case, it would be better to sanction his movements, if only so that he does not waste time concealing his presence from the Vanguard. Ophiuchus has not been able to argue around a firmly reasoned position. It seems we are both stricken by doubt.
We can little stand to lose Osiris's knowledge.
And I would hate to lose his friendship.
I suspect, in the end, there will be little choice but to permit Osiris's free movement. That being said, delaying such a decision as long as possible to give him time to heal, to give us time to search—may be the best of several imperfect options.
I am still worried.